Top 5 quotes we've heard in India to date

1. Sorry sir, thats an Irish Credit card, it wont work here.

2. Taxi man - you want air con?
    us - yes please
    Taxi man - that costs an extra 120 rupees

3. Bloke outside restaurant - you want food?
    Us - we're just looking thanks (as we look at menu)
    Bloke - yes lady, we do not sell rat or dog. Only velly best in our restaurant. Yes lady.(we slowly edged our way away)

4. Bloke - Can I help you sir?
    Mal - Do you sell bottles of water?
   Bloke - yes sir, very good sir. We only sell putrified water here
   (sue- ahhh bless)

5. Guy - where you from.
    Us - (as we sigh) England!
    Guy - lovely jubbly (in a hindi accent)